Nymphomania

Nymphomania is an addiction to sex. This is compulsive pathological behavior that has nothing to do with a strong sexual appetite. “We no longer use the term nymphomania too much, we talk more about hypersexuality, a disorder that can affect both women and men”.

Nymphomania, this pathology linked to sexual addiction, is talking about her. And for good reason, some cases have caused a scandal, including Charlie Sheen, Kanye West or the hidden decadent life of Tiger Woods. Director Steve McQueen also drew on pathology for the film “Shame”, revealing the violence of an erotomaniac’s everyday life. Blamed, sex addicts indeed suffer from this disease which is wrongly associated with sexual deviance. Focus on nymphomania, a disorder that is hard to understand.

This hyperactive sexual behavior is disabling on a daily basis since it affects all spheres of life: private, professional, friendly, family…

What sexuality in the nymphomaniac woman?

Nymphomania is characterized by compulsive and greedy sex addiction. Nymphomaniacs have barely finished sex when they already want to start again. As for the choice of partner, it is quick since there is no selection. “These women do not select their partner, they take whoever comes first. And when they do not find it, they are very insistent in obtaining sex, bordering on harassment”, explains Jaqueline Breut. When they don’t have a sexual partner, they masturbate. Their behavior resembles that of a drug addict in need of drugs or of an alcoholic in need of alcohol. “The slightest frustration or annoyance sends them into compulsive masturbatory behavior.”

Read also: Erotomania mental illness is the delusional certainty of being loved (one sided love)

These continual impulses are invasive on a daily basis and can harm the relationships they maintain with others: professional, friends, family, love … “This addiction can harm their work but also their friendships because they can sting the little one. friend of the girlfriend. Their actions expose them to rejection from their relatives and they suffer enormously “.

The nymphomaniac woman is incapable of falling in love and being faithful to a partner.

Finally, nymphomania also pushes these women to adopt risky sexual behavior. They don’t hesitate to have unprotected sex. The drive is such that they forget everything else, especially the dangers.

What are the causes of hypersexuality in women?

Hypersexuality is a mental disorder related to a long-standing intrapsychic conflict. It is in fact a symptomatic defense mechanism of an unresolved psychological problem. “It is often a question of abandonment or an oedipus that did not go well with a rather failing father or on the contrary very rewarding when his daughter was a child.” For fear of being abandoned once again, the nymphomaniac woman needs to always be on the front of the stage or seeks to regain that benevolent and wonderful gaze that she enjoyed throughout her childhood. “These women do not understand why men do not regard them as their father. All of this is of course unconscious, they do not realize it”, analyzes our expert.

How to treat hypersexuality?

Finding the cause of this obsession with sex is the first thing to do. Pinpointing the source of the problem allows these women to realize the seriousness of their addiction. For this, the hypersexual patient needs to feel confident with the therapist who follows her. We speak of a therapeutic alliance. Once trust has been established between the two parties, the therapeutic work will be done gradually with the aim of helping her to be an actor in her life and no longer a spectator.

The first step is to shift the obsession from their focus to something other than sex. “It can be theater, for example. The idea is to stage them differently, to highlight their qualities to teach them to shine other than through their devouring appetite for sex.”

The second step is to adapt your behavior and take a step back. How? ‘Or’ What ? Through small rituals:

I avoid places and situations that promote sex (by going out less, for example).
I try to get away from the anxiety-provoking situation I find myself in by writing it down and describing the state of mind I find myself in. This does not necessarily prevent the occurrence of sexual intercourse, but the writing helps the patient to take a step back from her actions and a fortiori, to think before taking action.
There are also drug treatments that inhibit libido. They have a physiological and not a psychological effect, hence the importance of having recourse, in addition, to psychological help.

In the long term (a few weeks or even a few months), therapeutic work allows these women to open up to stable romantic relationships. “In general, they manage to get rid of this addiction when they taste the small pleasures of married life”. Love and stability will snowball as their friendships and professional relationships become healthier. Experiencing something other than suffering, loneliness and insatiability helps them to let go of this sex addiction. They discover a different and fulfilling sexuality.

Causes of Nymphomania

It is a mental disorder. The psychoaffective cause is often invoked: this behavior can result from an abandonment, from a poorly managed Oedipus … For fear of being abandoned again, the nymphomaniac constantly seeks sexual rapprochement, synonymous with emotional attachment for her. “This behavior is also manifested in cases of bipolar disorder, during manic episodes”, specifies the psychiatrist. On the other hand, a sudden hypersexuality can be explained by a neurological origin, and more particularly an attack of the limbic system, or be consecutive to the taking of a medical treatment (certain treatments against the disease of Parkinson for example).

Diagnostic

It is based on the description of the behavior and the resulting suffering. “It is often relatives who talk about it more easily”, adds Dr. Lemoine.

When to consult?

When the situation is a source of suffering, that it disrupts relationships with others.

Who to consult?

A psychiatrist or a psychologist will be the best interlocutor to talk about nymphomania.

“Cognitive and behavioral therapies and hypnosis are the most effective. Drug treatments such as antidepressants for depression and also because they inhibit libido are sometimes used.

What are the psychological mechanisms of sex addiction?

Whatever sexual practice is used, the mechanism is always the same. The addict seeks to drown out a negative feeling (boredom, anxiety or the like) by resorting to the immediate gratification that comes from sex. It is the same psychological mechanism as that of the alcoholic or drug addict.

Like the drug addict to obtain the same satisfaction, he is led to increase the doses to obtain the same effects and in the end he no longer feels pleasure.

How do you know if you are addicted to sex?

The sex life of the addict is a frantic race empty of sensation. The compulsive nature of his behavior makes him take risks for himself and those around him: physical injury, sexually transmitted infection, social isolation, romantic break-up.

In addition to these risks, the addict is in the grip of great psychological suffering. The awareness of not having control damages one’s self-esteem. The obsessive sexual thoughts in his mind all the time prevent him from having normal interactions with others.

Sexual addiction like most addictions is frequently coupled with other addictions such as alcoholism or drug use (mainly drugs that affect sexual performance).

Sex addiction: a hormonal imbalance?

Looking for the causes of a high libido requires referring to a “norm” but it should be remembered that in terms of libido there are naturally disparities between individuals without systematically worrying about them.

It is known that libido is linked to the production of testosterone. There is a direct link between the amount of testosterone produced and the level of male libido.

To learn more about testosterone, you can read our article********************************–

However, hyperlibido can be a symptom of some illnesses. This is because hyperlibido can be caused by certain hormonal imbalances or by bipolarity.

What is the difference between sex addiction and hypersexuality?
The Sexaddict and the Hypersexual are 2 people with above “normal” sexual activity.

The difference between the two lies in the notion of enjoyment / suffering.

The hypersexual retains control of his libido which gives him the opportunity to thrive in intense and rich sexuality as the sex addict suffers from his compulsive behavior and the vicious cycle he undergoes.

Where the hypersexual consciously lives a life full of diverse experiences, the addict compulsively repeats the same disease pattern over which he has no control.

The consequences of sex addiction on the couple

More than just a desire, the sex addict has a compulsive need for sex. This is materialized by an increased dependence on cybersex, an inordinate frequency of masturbation, the need to increase the number of sexual partners or even a frantic consultation of X movies. The addiction to sex pushes men or women to focus their daily lives on sex. ‘satisfaction of his impulses, to the detriment of his professional and family life and of his couple. His quest for sex at all costs takes precedence over the rest, which he gradually neglects, often with disastrous effects.

For many reasons, sex addiction is a danger for the couple. The sex addict does nothing but consume sex, which becomes commonplace and loses its original purpose – to share a privileged moment of intimacy: the couple no longer considers their relations under the sign of sexual pleasure and love. In addition, the partner with sex addiction is very demanding, and the other fails to keep pace. This is why most people affected by a sex addiction cheat on their partner, as adultery can lead to the couple breaking up. But the most unfavorable outcome, both for the sex addict on a personal level and for lovers in their life together, is the hypothesis in which addiction leads to depression.

How can you help someone who is sex addicted?

Like any form of addiction, sex addiction is a source of suffering for the person concerned: it ends up having an impact on their professional, emotional and social life.

So we have to talk about it, tackle the problem, even if it is not easy.

You do not have to go into the heart of the problem (the idea is not to have the place of a therapist), but to try to make the person think about the problems related to his addiction; without necessarily talking about his addiction directly.

An addict often turns a blind eye to their addiction, but if it comes from someone close to them, chances are they will listen to you. The important thing is that there is awareness.

Then, above all, the person must not feel guilty: it is simply necessary to seek to help him. And the best possible help when faced with an addiction is the help of a specialist, such as a sex therapist.

Being surrounded by a loved one is of course important and will be decisive; but it is very difficult to get out of an addiction on your own: it is a process that takes time and work.

Sources: PinterPandai, New York University, International Business Times

Photo credit: Nick Youngson CC BY-SA 3.0 Alpha Stock Images

Photo source: PicPedia