Energy Vampire (Psychic Vampire)
Energy Vampire or Psychic vampires can act in the professional, friendly, romantic or family environment. Psychic vampires can act in the professional, friendly, romantic or family environment.
They suck our energy, ask for advice and services but give nothing in return. In family, at work or in a relationship, “psychic vampires” are psychologically and emotionally exhausting. How to live with them? Explanations.
They do not suck our blood but suck our vitality. In both professional and personal life, “psychic vampires” take advantage of us, monopolize our ideas, exhaust us by dint of requests of all kinds.
Why this parallel with the vampire?
The comparison seemed relevant to me for several reasons: with a psychic vampire as with a “real” vampire, the victims feel exhausted, drained of their energy. The vampire is a universal myth. Psychic vampires are also found everywhere and at all times. One can wonder moreover if these personalities did not inspire the myths. Finally, psychic vampires can’t stand being exposed. When we discover them, they lose all power.
What are the salient personality traits of the Energy Vampire or psychic vampire?
We speak of “occasional vampirism” when a person particularly likes to attract attention, by speaking loudly in restaurants or at work, for example. There is a deeper form of vampirism. Within the couple, as a family, the vampire uses our energy for his benefit. It perverts a central notion in human relations: that of exchange. Takes it without ever giving back.
What warning signs should you keep in mind?
Be aware that psychic vampires don’t want to hurt us. They even have every interest in preserving us. They will therefore constantly seek to capture our attention, our listening. They ask for reassurance and things often have to be done for them. When you systematically give up your needs and personal pleasure in favor of someone, you have to worry.
Why do these people need to “steal” their loved ones?
Some people just don’t like to give. They are selfish. These cases remain rare. Psychic vampires are more often very dependent people, unable to rejuvenate themselves emotionally and intellectually. This may be the result of a childhood where parents gave too much: they did not learn emotional autonomy. The result is a profound lack of self-confidence. Still, this is in no way an excuse to vampirize others!
Psychic vampires must have attractive personalities to be able to give in to them…
Indeed, some of them have a great power of seduction. They use their charms to vampirize us, especially in the couple. We are more and more suspicious of these people, who are often taken for narcissistic perverts.
The majority of psychic vampires play on our natural tendency for compassion, humanity and affection. More than great seducers, they behave like little children whom we would like to take care of.
What is the typical personality of the ideal victim?
These are people who naturally have a lot of empathy, a propensity for affection. They think they can give to infinity. Some even feel valued by these incessant requests. They feel like they’re important in this “vampire-vampire” relationship. These can be people who are afraid of not being loved or who feel they have been too spoiled with life, that they have received too much. This imaginary guilt leads them to want to “fix” others. It gives meaning to their life.
Should we then be wary of everyone to avoid being vampirized?
Of course not! We must not conclude that we must not help anyone but in order to give, we must preserve ourselves. Some people get eaten up without even realizing that their relationships are unhealthy. To avoid this happening, it is important to learn how to say stop in time.
How to get out of anxiety-provoking relationships with a psychic vampire?
Becoming aware of this is already a first step. Of course, we can continue to give, but not as much. Better to “dose” what you transmit and what you keep for yourself. The main thing seems to me to be to put things in the light, to talk to those around them to make the psychic vampire’s power inoperative.
We can express our feelings to him, explain the effects that his behavior produces, bearing in mind that he will probably continue to hang on, by pressing where it hurts: whether it is our tendency to guilt, the need to be loved, the debt we feel we have towards him, etc. Finally, if the break is obviously not mandatory, we must allow ourselves to reach this end if we can no longer do otherwise.
Can the energy vampire or psychic vampire regain autonomy?
It is often difficult. If we feel like this, we can try to understand why we are there, how our childhood has conditioned our behavior. Vampirism is very well treated with psychotherapy. Its analytical dimension makes it possible to delve into the roots of evil in order to achieve autonomy and, finally, to be free.
What to do with an energy vampire?
The hardest part is recognizing that you are vampirized. Once you realize this, the reaction is not the same depending on your relationship with the vampire.
If it is a colleague (who appropriates our work, steals our ideas …), it is better to denounce him to his superiors and to other colleagues. It is also preferable to move away, even if it means changing positions.
If it is a loved one to whom you are attached, it is more difficult because you want to avoid a radical breakup and lose the person. “When it comes to a child, it is possible to change it by helping to empower itself. When it is an elderly person, you have to live with it, you are not going to re-educate it.”
Generally speaking, some advises to put some distance and find other helpers for the vampire, other sources of energy. The idea is not to devote your entire life to the vampire, giving less and less often. The victim also has to work on their guilt and self-confidence so that they don’t always feel pressured to give a lot to the other.
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